The pastor entered his donkey in a race and it won. The pastor was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again, and it won again.
The local paper read:
PASTOR’S ASS OUT FRONT
The bishop was so upset with this kind of publicity that he ordered the pastor not to enter the donkey in another race.
The next day, the local paper headline read:
BISHOP SCRATCHES PASTOR’S ASS
This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the pastor to get rid of the donkey. The pastor decided to give it to a nun in a nearby convent.
The local paper, hearing of the news, posted the following headline the next day:
NUN HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN
The bishop fainted. He informed the nun that she would have to get rid of the donkey. She sold it to a farmer for $10.
The next day the paper read:
NUN SELLS ASS FOR $10
This was too much for the bishop, so he ordered the nun to buy back the donkey and lead it to the plains where it could run wild.
The next day the headlines read:
NUN ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE
The bishop was buried the next day.
The moral of the story is . . .
Being concerned about public opinion can bring you much grief and misery. Even shorten your life. So be yourself and enjoy life. Stop worrying about everyone else’s ass and you’ll be a lot happier and live longer!
Have a nice day.
Yep. You heard it here first. I know everyone and their grandmother are predicting that oil prices will continue to rise into the stratosphere reaching 6-8 dollars per gallon in the not too distant future. There’s peak oil theory, increased use in other up-and-coming industrial nations, etc. I, however, think oil price increases are not sustainable. Look at what’s happening right now. At four dollars per gallon, people are finally starting to get the picture. It’s actually beginning to affect more than just their discretionary spending. Until now, most people just ended up saving a little less of their income each year to continue their energy-wasting lifestyle. Now, it’s hitting them to where they are actually thinking about many of their trips to the store or whether or not that trip to the beach is worth it. You can see it in the number of trucks and SUVs for sale in everyone’s front yard.
Obviously, the price of oil has increased costs of almost everything that we use. Most consumer products are made from oil; if not directly, then certainly in the plastic packaging that it comes in. Transporting the products from the manufacturer to the retail outlets is also going up. If the price of oil were to continue unabated, there would be a worldwide recession. No nation could continue its oil-based economy at those higher price levels. With a collapsing economy, sales of goods would plummet, unemployment would skyrocket and oil prices and its use would decrease accordingly.
It’s just not in the best long-term interests of either the oil producers or consumers to see the price of oil go up unchecked. The price is reaching the point where a real hard look is being made at alternative energy sources. Oil extraction from shale and tar sands is becoming feasible. Nuclear power and offshore drilling have proven themselves as a safe means of providing energy. Increasing their use at this point in time may not affect the price of oil in the short term. However, it will have an impact on our energy independence and long-term future. Politicians need to get off their collective butts and start thinking long-term.
I’m not saying that the price of oil will collapse to 2-3 dollars per gallon, although it’s not an impossibility either. I do think that we’ve reached a peak and prices will either stay level for some time to come or will slowly decrease below the four dollar mark.
Well, folks. There you have it. My prediction on oil prices. No credentials or advanced degree (or undergraduate degree, for that matter) in Economics to back this up. Just my take on the world. Of course, if there’s a major war with Iran, or some other catastrophic event in the Middle East, all bets are off. Stay tuned.
Casket of Medal of Honor recipient, PO2 Michael Monsoor, U.S. Navy SEAL
Well, it’s the day after the 4th of July. Many people spent the day yesterday getting together with family or friends and enjoying the start of a three-day weekend. A lot of people also went to a local venue in the evening to enjoy a fireworks display. Depending on where you were or what you did, you might not have given a whole lot of thought to the reason behind the holiday celebration. I don’t think I need to get into any elaborate discussion of our country’s fight for independence and the sacrifices that many made to give us the freedom and liberty we have and, in most cases, take for granted.
I would, however, like you to take less than five minutes of your time to view a video by clicking on the link below. It’s a tribute to a Navy SEAL who paid the ultimate price, his life, so his fellow teammates could live. He did it for us, too, as many have done before him so we can continue to enjoy the many benefits and privileges of being a U.S. citizen.
To view the video, click here.
Thank you, Petty Officer Michael Monsoor. You are a hero in the truest sense of the word. We salute you and offer you our heartfelt thanks for your selfless devotion to duty, honor and country. You make me proud to be an American.
(For those that don’t know, the shiny items on the top of the casket are the gold Tridents worn by all Navy SEALS on their uniforms. While the casket was being brought to the burial site, each Navy SEAL took their Trident and embedded it into the casket.)
Since General Clark doesn’t seem to know when to shut his mouth, I’ll post another article myself. Liberal-leaning media outlets fall all over themselves when it comes to printing disparaging remarks about a Republican candidate. And when it comes from a military general, they’re salivating profusely from the mouth. However, what you almost never hear are some of the “inconvenient truths” about Clark himself. Let’s discuss them, shall we?
General Clark served as the U.S. Supreme Allied Commander in Europe during Clinton’s presidency and our short-term war in the Balkans. What many people don’t remember or realize is that Clark was relieved of his duty early as NATO commander. Shortly after the end of the conflict, the Chairman of the Joint Chiefs of Staff said, “The reason he came out of Europe early had to do with integrity and character issues.” If that isn’t a sharp slap in the face to a military man, I don’t know what is. Clark has always been a self-serving, photo-grabbing individual. While serving as NATO Commander, even his Secretary of Defense told him to get his face off the TV. Now, he’s constantly seen on the media circuit, trying to keep himself in the limelight.
Finally, let’s discuss the premise of his argument concerning McCain’s qualification to be president. Clark said, “I don’t think riding in a fighter plane and getting shot down is a qualification to be president.” That’s true enough. However, how he handled himself subsequent to that event speaks volumes. I can’t begin to imagine the sustained torture he endured for over five years in captivity. What many people don’t know is that the North Vietnamese offered to release him years earlier when they found out that he was the son of a Navy Admiral. He refused the offer. Those years of torture exacted a punishing toll on his body. From all the times that they broke his bones, he is unable to lift his arms above his shoulders.
I certainly don’t agree with McCain on many political issues. He is not my first choice for president. However, Clark’s characterizations are just plain wrong. No, Senator McCain doesn’t qualify for the presidency for being shot down in North Vietnam. How he has carried himself since then does.
I’m finding the Democratic Party, and Senator Obama’s campaign in particular, as becoming more and more disingenuous as time goes on. Today was certainly a low point in my mind. Their campaign has been constantly saying that they’re going to run a clean campaign and be different than the “typical” Washington-style variety. They’re all about change and this “new direction” that they’re going to take this country. What a joke! They’re as bad or worse.
Today, General Wesley Clark, one of Senator Obama’s military advisors, took cheap shots at Senator McCain’s military service. To say that because he was commanding an aviation squadron during a non-war period doesn’t count as executive responsibility is incredibly dishonest on his part. He was in the Army long enough to know the incredible responsibility and accountability given to commanding officers. It’s as demanding as any job you can ever find in the civilian world. If this came from someone who never served in the military, I might cut that person a little slack. However, coming from a retired Army general is, without a doubt, nothing but a cheap political shot. I’ll bet if you talked to any military man or woman without a political agenda, they would say that General Clark was a jerk. This man has lost any respect from me that he had earned from his military service.
If these are the people that Senator Obama is going to surround himself with, God help us if he’s elected to serve as our president.
Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn’t seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other man pulls out his cell phone and calls emergency services.
He gasps to the operator: “My friend is dead! What can I do?”
The operator in a calm, soothing voice replies: “Take it easy. I can help. First, let’s make sure he’s dead.” There is a silence, then a shot is heard.
Back on the phone, the hunter says, “OK, now what?”
Staind is an American alternative rock band from Massachusetts. The band was formed in 1995. They’ve produced a total of five studio albums during this time and came out with a greatest hits album in 2006 titled, The Singles Collection. Their greatest hits album is definitely worth purchasing. Their best-selling album by far was their 2001 release of Break The Cycle. This produced several hit singles including the very popular, It’s Been Awhile. However, my favorite song, So Far Away, is from their fourth album, 14 Shades of Grey. They’re scheduled to release a new album later this Summer.
To see their So Far Away music video, click here.
For more information on Staind, click here.
Yesterday was a day of celebration and sadness. One of my sisters-in-law passed away recently and we were having a family gathering to honor her life and our memories of her. We spent a few moments along the dunes of Lake Michigan and spread her ashes there because it was a setting that she would have approved of and appreciated. Pat was the third oldest in a family of eight children. Her husband and only son survive her as well as all of her brothers and sisters.
Pat was a unique person – quite the character. She did like to talk a lot and I have to admit that at times she drove me crazy. However, above all, she was a good person. A true friend. She loved life and tried to enjoy every minute of it. The littlest things would bring her joy and a smile on her face. She always seemed to see the positive in a given situation. If there was someone in the room with a smile or having a laugh, more than likely it was Pat. Even in the end, she still carried that positive attitude. I didn’t know her as well as some of my brothers-in-law because we lived at opposite ends of the country most of the time. She was always pretty much game for anything and willing to go along with whatever others wanted to do. When we did visit her, she always made us feel welcome. While she lived in California, she especially enjoyed taking us through the wine country and visiting the vineyards and tasting rooms. She really enjoyed her wines.
Pat was a very unique person in her own special way. She made friends easily and would do anything for you. I wish I had appreciated her more when she was still around. I’m sure that for those who were closest to her, she will be sorely missed. However, I’m sure they’ll have a few good smiles and laughter when they recall their memories of being with her. We will all miss her.
Farewell, Pat!
Here’s a list of 25 bumper stickers you might enjoy.
1. Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again.
2. My wife keeps complaining I never listen to her (or something like that).
3. Honk if you’ve never seen a gun fired from a moving vehicle.
4. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.
5. My mother was a moonshiner, and I love her still.
6. Does anal retentive have a hyphen?
7. Jesus loves you! Everybody else thinks you’re a jerk.
8. What would Scooby do?
9. The last thing I want to do is hurt you. But it’s still on the list.
10. I don’t have a beer gut; I have a protective covering for my rock hard abs.
11. I am not infantile, you stinky poopyhead.
12. Honk if you want to see my finger.
13. I’m trying to imagine you with a personality.
14. Is it time for your medication or mine?
15. Love may be blind, but marriage is a real eye opener.
16. Wanted: Meaningful overnight relationship.
17. A day without sunshine is like night.
18. In America, anyone can be president. That’s one of the risks you take.
19. I need someone real bad. Are you real bad?
20. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
21. As long as there are tests, there will be prayer in public schools.
22. Keep honking while I reload.
23. Driver carries no cash. He’s married.
24. I drive far too fast to worry about cholesterol!
25. Vegetarian: Indian word for lousy hunter.
Well, nothing like another blog entry based on a bike ride out in farming country. The above picture was taken today while riding out in the country southwest of my home. The farmer’s field has pretty much been decimated by all the rain we’ve gotten over the past week or so. The only part of the field that was saved was the area that was located on an upslope. There were many fields along my ride that had succumbed to the same fate. A double-whammy is hitting farmers this year. The rising cost of fuel is increasing their cost to fertilize and plant their crops as well as increasing the cost to harvest and deliver them. Add to that the crop loss due to weather and you can see why our food prices are going to be even higher as Summer arrives.
The Midwest has taken a real beating this past week. Compared to some areas in Iowa and Illinois, our local farmers got off lucky. Some of the news stories out of these states are unbelievable. Entire towns and roadways were literally swept away or so badly damaged to be beyond repair. It’s hard to imagine the destructive force that several inches of rain can have on a community. I don’t know how I’d handle my house being severely damaged or destroyed. Between sweat equity, cherished possessions and memories, it would be a bitter pill to swallow. My prayers go out to these people. Feel blessed if things are going well in your neck of the woods.
